Monday, June 17, 2013

"When I'm a Parent, I'll Never...."

Before you become a parent, you have opinions. You say things like, "Oh, I'm never going to buy ____ for my kid!" and "When I have a baby, I'll never do _______."

Then you have a baby, and you get the whip cream and chocolate syrup out of the fridge, pile it on and EAT YOUR WORDS.

Here are some of the things I was absolutely sure I'd never do as a parent that I sooooo do:

1. Buy "unnecessary" things that make life easier. For example--Boogie Wipes. For those of you out there who aren't parents, Boogie Wipes are like regular wet wipes but for your face. They're made with saline and they don't cause redness when you wipe your kid's nose for the hundreth.time.that.day. Would a regular old tissue work just as well? Probably. But the scaly little red patch that quickly formed under Little Man's nose when he got his first cold broke my heart. Enter the Boogie Wipes.

Another thing I spend money on I swore I never would? Name brand sippie cups. After a week of milk drips souring in the car, I tossed the Target brand and welcomed Tommee Tippee with open arms. In my (almost) three years as a mom I have learned: there are times when the name brand is better.

I drew the line at the wipe warmer, though. Did it make Little Man jump every time a chilly wipe touched his tushie? Sure, but heating wipes seemed like serious excess--not to mention a fire hazard.

2. Use nap time to be a productive human being. I know people that run entire businesses and write novels during naptime, and I was sure I'd be one of them. What do I actually do during naptime? Watch "Charmed" on Netflix and play on Pinterest.

3. Co-sleep. Whoa there, safety patrol! Before you jump all over me, let me point out that we never had a "family bed". Little Man has always started and ended the night in his own bed. But now that he's in the big boy bed, there are nights when he creeps into our room at 2 AM and crawls into bed next to me. And I let him. He falls asleep, all warm and sweet and snuggled up next to me, and I fall asleep too. And then after awhile, he kicks me and I put him back into his own bed.

And some things that I said I would never do and still don't do:

1. Talk baby talk. Sure, when Little Man was tiny I cooed nonsensical words at him. But Husband and I have always talked to him like a real person--no cutesy words for things, no adding unnecessary syllables to words. The result is that Little Man has an excellent vocabulary now that he is talking, and when someone does talk "baby" to him, he looks at them like they are crazy.

2. I don't make him do things he doesn't want to do. Do I encourage him strongly? Absolutely. But if we're at Gymboree and he is uncomfortable doing a group activity, I don't make him. Because all that leads to is a meltdown, which is no fun for him, us or anyone around us. When we visit Disney World, if he suddenly gets shy when we come face to face with a six foot goofy dog, I don't make him get close (instead, Mommy gets to give him a hug. Yay!). Even if we waited in a long line, its not worth the negative experience. On our first trip, we waited for half an hour just so Little Man could wave at Pooh and Tigger from a safe five feet away. Could we have watched them without standing in line? Sure. But Little Man got their attention and waves all to himself for a few moments, and that was a joy. He has a bubble, and we respect it.

3. Let him get away with tantrums in public places. Before I was a parent, there was nothing worse than trying to eat a meal while a kid at another table was screaming. And so I don't subject other people to my kid's moods. If Husband and I are dining out and Little Man reaches the end of his rope, one of us takes him outside. Luckily, we haven't had to do this too many times. But I am definitely the Mom who will leave a full grocery cart and carry my wailing kid out of the store.

Overall, I think I'm doing pretty good.

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